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Helloooo!! So since it's my 3rd year of blogging I have to be honest, there was a point in December when I thought I may quit and shut it all down because I had no idea where I wanted to go with my blog. Instead, I sat back and remembered my "why". Why was the reason I started my blog? Because I love writing, I love fashion and I love sharing my life experiences to help motivate others. That is when "Faith in Fear" started. We always share the happy stories but sometimes we need to be vulnerable enough to share the truth.
That is what today's blog is about. Why it's better to be truthful and honest than sugar coat things. Granted I realize there is a time and place for all things but I have gotten a lot of feedback and majority of my friends love that I am straight forward and say it like it is. But, I expect it back too.
I am the friend who will always tell you when something doesn't fit right. I will always tell you when you're an idiot to keep running back to the same loser over and over again. I am honest about my life, about my faults. If I like you, you'll know it. If I don't you will definitely know it.
I don't play pretend friends with people I don't like or respect. I also don't let anyone disrespect me. If you say something insulting or rude I will let you know it. If you are the best friend ever, I will tell you and show you.
I am as loyal as they come and I won't ever make promises I don't intend to keep. I talk a lot, a lot! But lately I do try to sit back and respond instead of react because here is what I found out. A reaction can sometimes be plain out nasty, "OMG that shirt is hideous". Now I know I can say this with some of my friends, but not all. So if it's someone who's a little more sensitive I may say, "I think you would look really awesome in something like this," and show an example.
I used to be unintentionally hurtful with my brutal honesty so I have tried to spruce it up a little bit. My reactions can be strong and I learned maybe not to say everything that comes to my mind, but instead think about the appropriate way to say it.
Funny story, I met my friend Alyssa in 2005ish at Clancy's Pub where I worked for about 6 years. She had just started and I had to train her. I told my manager time and again that I am not a good trainer, I am rude and don't pay attention. I still got the newbies. Anyway, Alyssa was 5 years younger than me and a little sheltered. Like never saw a clam, or a crab cake. Of course this was something I made fun of her for. (She is allergic to seafood so she gets a pass). But I used to snap at her "ALYSSA", tell her to get my drinks and would say "Me and my friends are going outback to smoke, you can come or not come I don't care." And she of course never came with. TBH I have no idea when it was that Alyssa and I became such good friends. She was so quiet but so hilarious. I told her what to do and she laughed it off. She never took offense to it but looking back, what a bitch I was. She loved it. 11 years later, I was in her wedding, helped get her a big girl job, and am now dating her husband's best friend! How about that?!
Most people appreciate the honesty but the point is, know your audience. Tracy for instance I can say anything to her however I want to say it about anyone in any form and she will die laughing. She never takes offense and knows I have a great big heart I just have a strong, Jersey girl opinion with a loud Italian mouth. Gianna, same thing! Marissa, ditto! All my girls know me, they know I don't say things to be hurtful or rude… it's who I am.
Sunshine mixed with a little bit of hurricane!